Not every hurt feeling calls for an apology.
For example, in the workplace an employee's feelings might be hurt by a bad work review. Is an apology needed? No. The truth is that some news is hard to share, and even more so, to receive. Don't over-apologise in awkward situations in an attempt to make others feel better. Save your apologies for when you truly feel that you would have done something differently if you could have a do-over.
A gentleman recently shared with me that he lovingly confronted an individual who had kept him waiting at a restaurant because she failed to communicate that her plans had changed. Plans do change at times, and that's okay, but the fact that this person didn't communicate and kept him waiting at the restaurant for over an hour was what troubled him. After being confronted, the offender could have justified her actions, shifted the blame to others, or even lashed out in defense. But instead, she owned up to her unintentional oversight, genuinely apologized, and vowed to be more considerate next time. The gentleman was able to receive the apology, extended forgiveness, and the relationship was immediately reconciled.
We should apologise when we are genuinely sorry, or, at the very least, when we can see the error in our own behavior or attitude... and when we have a genuine desire to change for the sake of the other person and our own integrity. It's easy to be blind to this, so humble and honest introspection is needed. But, if you are willing to do the work to decide if an apology is appropriate, you'll find your relationships will strengthen as a result.
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